Has It Really Been That Long?

Sorry I have not posted in over a week. I got home a week ago today and have been pretty much just enjoying my time here. I started back at my internship yesterday and I am still waiting to hear back from a real, paying job. I had an interview on Friday with Sears, so maybe that will turn into something.

I am still liking the CellCept, but unfortunately I got my blood test results back a couple days ago and one of my liver enzymes was increased and my C3 complement was high, which I gather means acute inflammation of some sort. Hopefully when I go to The Lupus Center next Tuesday they don't tell me that I have to stop it.

However, while it is still working very well, I have been a little more achy over the past few days, even when taking pain medications constantly. But it is nothing I cannot manage and my evergy levels have been really good.

I am still waiting to get my grades back. I think I got 5 A- and a C+ in Spanish. That class was horrible for me. I took French in high school and unfortunately, that's what I spoke in Spanish class. It was not so bad last semester, so I don't know why I couldn't get the hang of it this semester. In any case, I hope that the C+ wont keep me off the Dean's List for this semester because I have all As for my other five classes.

As I have said before, I am a little crazy about my grades.

Hope everyone has a good week!

Rheumatologist Update

So I saw my rheuamtologist today. I apparently have tendonitis in my wrist which is why it is so weak. She also offered to switch me to CellCept if my insurance approves it so I will have to call them tomorrow. She also offered to have me see a kidney specialist, but since the treatment for lupus nephritis is what I am doing now, I see no need. There are no overt signs that my kidneys are in a lot of danger, just what was seen on the ultrasound. I also really don't want a biopsy.

I got my blood tests today from a couple weeks ago after I reduced the Imuran. They are pretty unremarkable. My complement levels are still normal, but they did drop off a lot. Hopefully that won't become an issue. My CBC was a lot better than it has been in a while, which was a nice surprise.

Spring break is tomorrow and my dreaded comm midterm is over!! I have a Spanish homework due tomorrow and also a small quiz. I have my "pitch" for my case study and I still really don't know what I am doing. My teacher is a TA and she is not very good at explaining stuff. I'm totally lost. I know I want to do something on the show Boy Meets World because I can quote almost every episode word for word. But I'm not sure what I want to do on that show, and I am not sure what I am supposed to do. I messaged a friend in the class who has already had her pitch. Hopefully she will get back to me and help me out.

I want to leave school around 12:30 in the afternoon so that I can get home before rush hour. Hopefully I manage to stick to that timeline!

Now, Seriously...

So my health insurance covered my surgery. But they did not cover the anesthesia. The bill for that is more than I made in all of last year. It's ridiculous. I have no way to pay for it. And I do not think that it is going to get paid anytime soon. My financial situation is bad. My shoes have holes in them and I do not have enough money to replace them. My money normally goes to bills and prescriptions. It does not leave a lot left over. And I hold onto that money because I never know when something will come up. Another prescription might be added and I will need that money for the copay. Or my car, which is the only method I have to getting to my rheumatologist, will have some issue and I need the money to fix it.

I'm really scared about my financial future. I am 21 years old. I have school loans to think about. I am not in debt because I spent too much on credit cards like a lot of people my age, but because I have a chronic illness that has required multiple, expensive interventions. I should not have to worry about this. My biggest concern about graduating is finding a way to pay off this bedt and having health insurance. I would love to go to graduate school. I will have health insurance then, but I will also have more student loans. There really is no way to win.

Speaking of health interventions, I am really sick of being sick right now. I can't seem to catch a break. I've had mouth sores the past few days. Now my throat hurts and I can't tell if it is because I have mouth sores on the back of my tongue or its a real sore throat. One of my apartment-mates is sick with a cough and sore throat. My ears have started to itch and hurt as well.

And then there are the biweekly blood draws that I am really confused about. Some of them are fully covered by my insurance and some are not. I need to figure out why that it. I have paid off one bill, but I can't do anymore. I will need new sneakers soon, and there's that little issue of needing to feed myself.

Oh, and I got a tuition bill. Financial aid said they would help me with it last semester, so I hope that when I go to them they will say the same thing. Even though it is definitely small compared to other people's, I really cannot afford it.

My job is being ridiculously stressful as well. It is a campus work-study job. There is no need for that.

Well, I am just a whiner today. But I' m pretty stressed out and what are blogs for?

The Verdict is Not In

I saw the doctor today after calling early this morning. No answers, but that's kind of the story of my life. They told me to double a medicine I take called Aygestin, which is really just a dose of hormones to replace some hormones my Lupron injections take away. If that is to work then it should in the next few days. So I will go back on Tuesday. If I have not stopped bleeding then they will do an ultrasound to make sure there are no masses. My exam went well, the doctor felt nothing, so I think this is just one of those weird things that happens.

I also got my blood test results today (because at least some of my mail arrived!!!!). Everything was basically normal. My white blood cell count was a little low and my blood protein was high. Not quite sure about that, but the doctor did not seem too concerned.

I'm probably just going to relax this weekend. No crazy parties like last weekend. That was a bit much for me to handle!

So Happy Its Almost the Weekend

The first full week of school is almost done...and I already missed a class. It wasn't my fault, though, I promise! I had my rheumatologist appointment today and they are the slowest office I have ever come upon. My appointment was at 9:15, about 20 minutes away from campus. My class was at 11:15 and I thought I would have enough time to go get my tests and stuff done. Apparently not.

The appointment went fine. The doctor said my strength in my arms and especially my legs is not where it should be so she showed me some exercises to do. She also scolded me for not getting my biweekly blood tests done since early November. Oh well, I hate being stuck all the time and I am really tired of doctors. So I had a bunch of blood tests done. She said if she cannot find any reason for my daily fevers then she will start a full scale infection work up. I don't think I have one, I really just think it is the lupus.

Tomorrow begins the weekend! I think I am going to relax with friends a lot. Just the way I like it.

Pre-Op Done, Now I Just Have the Op

So I had my pre-op appointment on Thursday. It was pretty simple. The anesthesiologist seemed completely overwhelmed by my medical history, so hopefully that won't be a problem. I got blood drawn from a wonderful lady who was so gentle I didn't feel it at all!

Today I went up to move the big stuff into my apartment. My dad saw it for the first time and he was very impressed. It's a great space. It is not a shared closet, and I am very thankful for that.

I also found out that my grandma is coming up Sunday from New York City to help take care of me after the surgery. I looooooove my grandma, so I am very, very happy about that.

I also have to shower for three days in a row with this special red soap to help kill bacteria on my skin.

Surgery is scheduled for 11:30 am on Monday and I need to arrive at the hospital at 10 am.

No Energy

I don't know what my lupus is doing right now. I am supposed to get blood tests every 2 weeks and its been, well, a while since I got them done. I get a CBC with electrolytes, liver and kidney function, sed rate and a urinalysis every 2 weeks and then ANA, complements and other assorted antibodies every 6 weeks. I've been slacking, and therefore I don't know what the lupus is doing other than making me feel like crap. Compounding the problem is that my deigestive system is being messed up by a very large stone blocking the flow of things.

One thing I am noticing is fatigue. I do not have the energy that a lot of my friends have. The thought of going to some club until 2 in the morning dancing and drinking and partying exhausts me, let alone actually doing it. I saw the movie Avatar today (which was A LOT better than I thought) and it was 3 hours long. I also went to get something to eat in the same complex as the IMAX where we saw it. I was done by the time I got home. I wanted to run an errand and maybe also see a friend, but I was so tired. I haven't left my couch or the bed since then.

I get really frustrated with myself. Why can't I keep up with my friends? Its all about limits again, and I just need to realize that. I sometimes think that they think I am lame or whatever, but my body just can't handle very much. My joints have been beating me up recently and I'm constantly worrying about how the food I put into my body will make it feel. But most of my friends have known me for most of my life. And Ihave found some very understanding ones along the way. It's probably all in my head when I think they think I am lame.

But anyway, I hope to be feeling better soon and I hope that my surgery takes care of the problems I am having with my stomach. Or else I need to see a gastroenterologist and I am quite tired of doctors and tests.

P.S. RIP Adam Frey

Rough Week

Well, classes are over so I just have this week of finals. My first one is today from 4-6 and I will be so happy when it is done. It is for my class on world religions and that class has been an unnecessary struggle for no reason. I've been trying to figure out why. I just don't think anything was made clear. We got a lot of information, but none of it seemed contextualized to me.

I have had a lot of trouble with my stomach. It took me a long time to fall asleep last night because of pain and I woke up with pain too. Also a migraine. I got something to eat so I could take my medicine and luckily it has not made me sick. I really hope my gall bladder/liver/pancreas/whatever holds on until I can see the surgeon in a week. I have been running a slight fever, so I'm really trying to be conscious about how I am feeling.

Today I sign the papers to move into the apartment for next semester! So that's great news and I am really excited to get my own room and have a kitchen and bathroom I only have to share with 1-4 other people and not 34.

I cannot wait to go home. I just do not feel well. But I really want to get my finals over with. My hardest two are first. I have no exams on Wenesday, so that will be a nice break.

I also see my primary care doctor tomorrow. I got my antibody tests done again because I had not been feeling well. But of course I can flare without them being positive. So who knows what is going on. It might just be due to what is going on in my stomach.

So for now, I just have to get through this week without my stomach having a meltdown on me.

Pin Cushion

So I saw my doctor today for a follow up to headaches I have been having. He also had the results of the blood tests I had done a couple weeks ago at my rheumatologist's office. The good news was that my ANA was negative and the anti-DNA antibodies were "low". I forgot to ask about my sed rate and c-reactive proteins. The bad news was that some of my liver function tests were off, my urinalysis was not up to par and my calcium is high. So I have to go repeat those in the next few days. I'm getting tired of being a pin cushion.

I have explained before that I have something called Gilbert's syndrome which raises my bilirubin levels but causes no other real problems. This does not explain the results of my other liver function tests. That is what has me the most worried. I do not want anything happening to such an important organ. I have had high calcium before, but my parathyroid hormones are OK, so I do not know why that keeps happening. And I have also had weird urinalysis results before.

In better news, I think I did really well on my recent communications and neuroendocrinology exams. Spanish is up in the air. I am not good at oral exams and I realized some mistakes I made on the written exam. I think I did alright on the graded homework, though, and we have another one due Friday. Also, my world cinema and Shakespeare professors postponed the due dates of their papers until after Thanksgiving break and I am very thankful for that.

I have a history paper due on Monday and that is the only major thing I have due before I get to go home for Thanksgiving!

I registered for classes already for next semester. I am going to be taking 19 credits, so thats 6 3 credit courses and a one credit course. I will be taking Spanish 2, Psychological Problems in Contemporary Lit for my psychology major, The Ecology of Plagues to get rid of my last biological science requirement, New Media, Media Programming and Writing about Communications for my comm major and I am taking an Resident Assistant/Apartment Living Assistant class because I will be applying for both of those positions. I will also be having the same job with the same hours.

It will be a busy semester again, but I think I can handle it.